In today’s world of uncertainty and insecurities people often forget what confidence really means. We think about some superpowers which can drive a person to impress everyone and override everyone’s opinions in the room. But in fact it’s something much simpler then that.
A good example is people living in that good old times with knights and kings. To say that the time they lived in was unstable is to say nothing. Constant wars and fights for survival. No way to hide or run away. People lived and the only choice they had was taking advantage of what they had at current moment.
But there is more. I recognized that I finally understood what the confidence is when I watched the movie Home Alone. A child was not really afraid of anyone – not his elder brothers, not being alone in a small town or a big city. He took advantage of the situation he was in at that current moment. And what’s more important never hesitated to express his own opinion. Of course it’s just a movie but I could easily recognize that specific mindset.
The pattern is a behavior and relation to things. It’s not being afraid to loose anything. It’s though being able to fight for things. Confident people are not attached to anything and therefore can easily fight. Even though they may have something to loose. This is the answer.
The right way to be confident actually means thinking about things from their current availability perspective and not ownership. A job, a boyfriend or a girlfriend and even home are things which are generally available to us but we don’t own them and in theory can loose any time. It will be hard but tomorrow we can get all of these back or find alternatives. Being ready to fight and accept things as they are makes our life confident.
